Talking Race with Kids

Two main goals in raising children are to protect kids and teach them the difference between right and wrong. The murder of George Floyd at the hands of police, international protests against racism, and the rise in Anti-Asian attacks; how do we teach and talk to children about racism, discrimination, and civil unrest?  It is never too early to talk to our children about race and racism. Children hear about and are exposed to these topics through the news, schools, social media, and within their communities.  Parents and caregivers should help children understand what is happening before the child encounters it independently. Some questions to open a dialogue with your children can include (depending on age);

·         Who are your friends and what do you all have in common?

·         How do you choose who will be your friend?

·         What ways do kids look different / similar at your school??

·         Do your teachers ever talk about race?

·         What can you learn from the experiences of people of a different race?

·         What do you see happening in the world as it relates to race?

·         Do you think the color of a person’s skin influences how they see the world?

·         Do you feel that other people understand your race/culture?

Don’t be silent. Children look to their parents and caregivers to help filter and make sense of the world, and research shows that children as young at 6 months old recognize racial differences in people. Parents and caregivers may feel like they are unsure how to answer certain questions but it important to not shy away from the topic. Validate your child’s questions and feelings and ask questions in return about how they are feeling and why. This should not be a one time conversation but ongoing dialogue.

Casey McDaniel, LCSW